I won’t say that 2017 has been a terrible year, I have had much worse, but losing my cat after almost 2 decades of companionship certainly has put a damper on it, but I will try to look at all the things I did right and make way for this new year.
I understand a lot of people think of the changing of the new year as an arbitrary date, but I like to use it as a means of evaluating my life every year. What I did right and what can I improve?
As far as last years goals, I really only fully accomplished one. I started reading more. I read 34 books in 2017, most of them since July and that is probably as many as I’ve fully read the past decade, so yay. I forgot how much I loved reading. To be fair, about half of those were comic books but I still count it. I also rediscovered my nerd side, which I also missed. (Depression kind of sucks the joy out of all things and you forget you ever enjoyed it in the first place.)
Golden Age Wonder Woman is equal parts sexist (she did it all for the love of a man!) and goofy. But it has its awesome moments. I like this panel. Its kind of her go-to answer so far.
I did start exercising again, and cut a lot of extra salt out of my diet (still working on sugar, that one is harder). I started making more food from scratch because pre-made things have a tendency to upset my stomach.
My sister and I moved out of our house, got rid of a lot of stuff and are, overall, much happier. Owning a house is only an advantage if you can afford to keep it up, which we couldn’t. I am healthier too, because apparently something in the house was making me have breathing problems that got really bad the month before we moved.
A few of the notebook covers I have in my store.
Job-wise, I still have gone nowhere. In spite of trying hard to find a job that will actually allow me to pay for – anything, really, The job market where I live sucks and I can’t even get interviews. I did open an Etsy store. I make notebook covers and charms to decorate them. I am thinking about new items to add to it as well. Take a look at The Iridescent Agate if you’re curious (yes, shameless plug, why not?).
Writing overall, has been slim as well. I’ve been desperate to find ways of making a living and it has made writing hard. So this year, the focus is writing out of enjoyment and if I happen to write something marketable, I go for it. I don’t write well under pressure; my creativity freezes up and I doubt every word put to paper. I did once start to get past that, several years ago, I am hoping to do it again.
I am also going to try and blog more again. Every week I would think about doing it and never start, but I do miss it. Last Friday’s quote is one I am taking seriously this year
My bullet journal, currently a 3.5 x 5.5 Moleskine cahier. They only last a couple weeks, but I tried thicker books and didn’t like them. I like to be able to carry it around with me, sometimes tucked into a pocket. I am thinking of trying a Leuchturm 1917 in the same size. It has more pages and will last longer, but I have to order those online making them more expensive with shipping.
I’m back at bullet journaling again, using it to remind me of my goals and keep track of things I want to be habit and how often I do those things I want to stop. I’ve found a method that works for me after several unsatisfying ones and hopefully it will help me reach more of the goals this year.
So I step into this new year, hoping I can continue to make improvements in my life and repair more of the damage a decade of depressed and suicidal thoughts left. I want to focus more on the good things even when they are hard to find and create more success through once again having any fucks to give about my own life. It feels frightening and daunting but the quote on my bullet journal says it all: “Stay afraid. But do it anyway.” ~ Carrie Fisher